 |
|
|
|
|
|
|||||
|
||||||||||
|
Yablans Research Fund |
||||||||||
|
Suggestions, feedback, or to add your memory, photo or name to this Tribute |
||||||||||
|
|
 |
|
|
|
A Tribute to Gerry Yablans
Gerry Yablans was a loving husband to his wife Phyllis, a caring and loving father to his children Brian, Robin, and Seth, and their spouses, Linda, Norm and Nicole, a doting grandfather to their children, a caring brother, and a special friend to so many of us.
I am here today as a friend, representing the many friends that Gerry made during his adult life. There are so many memories; warm, happy memories. Yes, Gerry was my friend, perhaps my best friend. We all have friends but it is a measure of Gerry Yablans that so many people here today might very well say of Gerry that “he was my best friend; he did so much for me; he listened to me; he cared about me.”
He was indeed a friend, a caring generous friend who didn’t wait to be asked to help someone; he volunteered assistance. And he didn’t brag about what he had done. In fact, he usually was completely silent about it to preserve the pride and dignity of whomever he was helping. He wanted no applause for the things that he had done. If by accident I learned of one of his acts of generosity, and expressed admiration or gratitude, he would say “For what? I didn’t do anything. It’s actually helping me” or “whatever I did helped me more than so and so”. I can hear myself saying “Really?” and he would say “trust me on this” or “no one gives what as much as they can afford”. In this Synagogue, at Friday night services that he attended regularly, he sat in the last row. When I asked him “why did he do that?”, he told me that he wasn’t there to be seen; he was just there because he wanted to attend the service.
He liked to remind himself and his friends in our running group of the legend about the Roman Emperors who, as they rode in great splendor in their chariots after a victory, had someone stand behind them and whisper in their ear: “This too shall pass”.
Some of you may know that Gerry had become increasingly observant in recent years. He studied Torah regularly. In fact, during many jogging sessions, he would discuss the weekly reading with me and with others and shared the insights that he had learned and their relevance to our daily lives.
We jogged together for over 20 years. We jogged for many miles and hours at a time. I recently tried to calculate how many miles we had run together. For many years, we ran at least 40 miles a week, sometimes 50 or 60 miles in a week. In 50 weeks, that is over 2000 miles; 10,000 miles in 5 years. Over the 20 plus years, we probably jogged a total of 25,000 miles, the distance around the world at the equator. And while jogging we talked. We talked about life, family, religion, politics, philanthropy, business, medicine, nuclear medicine, medical politics, movies, plays, books. He always listened intently and amazingly remembered so many details; details that he would remind me of months later, not in an argumentative way but to help analyze a problem and to try to find the best path to take. Afterwards, he would thank me as if listening to me and my world had broaden his, as if he had benefited when he was actually helping me. I know that he did this with others also, listening to them in a manner that lifted their burden and then thanking them for the privilege of being a part of their life. You were never alone if Gerry was your friend.
Yes, Gerry was my friend, and he also called on me for medical advice. And when it came to this terrible final episode, Jerry was realistic about it all and tried to comfort and shield those closest to him. He did not indulge in self-pity or allow any of us to sink into pity or depression. He said: “Look, it is what it is; I just want the best shot at treatment– even if it all ends abruptly; I just want to be in the game, to know that I gave it my best shot; that I am not sitting helplessly on the sideline.” And that is what he did, he gave it his best shot.
Earlier in his life, his best shot had lifted him from poverty. He had grown up in a basement apartment in Williamsburg, to build and become the President and CEO of a multinational corporation, a large successful company that created jobs and incomes and lives for thousands of people in many countries all over the world. He was a pillar of this Synagogue and a supporter of other synagogues, as well as numerous causes throughout the world, including college scholarships for inner city children and medical research and education.
He played hard and worked hard and loved it all. He taught me and others how to live and as I think of it now, perhaps he also taught us how to die. A year ago, he lent me a book that he had received as a gift from Seymour Sherry. It was one of the books from the Bible,Koheles or as it is known in English,Ecclesiasteses. He told me to read it. It had given him peace and he thought that I would enjoy it. He said that after reading it, he realized that he was pleased with what he had accomplished in various areas of his life: family, work, leisure activities. In closing, I think he would have appreciated my sharing 3 short excerpts from Koheles with you. It begins: All is futile! What profit does man have for all his labor which he toils beneath the sun. A generation goes and a generation comes but the earth endures forever.
Later on: Everything has a season, and there is a time for everything under heaven A time for war and a time for peace A time to plant and a time to harvest A time to weep and a time to laugh A time to wail and a time to dance A time to scatter stones and a time to gather them up again A time to love and a time to hate A time to be born and a time to die
Koheles concludes: The sum of the matter when all has been considered: Fear God and keep his commandments for that is man’s whole duty.
Gerry Yablans kept the commandments. He sustained and enriched many lives and brought those he knew much happiness in their lives, in our lives. Gerry, thank you for the beauty of your life and the beauty that you brought into our lives, into my life. You have been my friend. I shall never forget you. I love you. I shall miss you. You will live in my memory.
Stan Goldsmith 7-20-00 |
|
|
| [Home] [Eulogies] [Obituaries] [Yablans Fund] [Memory Gallery] |